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Blinded by Beleaf

Image by Grant Osborne

Osaka, Japan – A trip to the Body Shop proved near fatal for one American man on Tuesday when a bottle of their “Beleaf”fragrance sprayed sideways into the right eye of Marlen Harrison, an American who claims to be a university professor. Harrison, a self-described fragrance addict whose sole purpose for entering The Body Shop was to “get a quick fix before heading uptown to Hermes for some designer shit” was caught by surprise when after depressing the sprayer on the small green bottle, was hit in the pupil by a renegade stream of alcohol-based eau de toilette. “The pain was immediate and shocking,” said Harrison, “I mean, after all these years of doing this- and I’ve done it everywhere – I couldn’t believe I had actually gotten hit. Still, I took it like a man.” Eye witnesses said that Harrison put his hand over his eye and began to cry. “He put the bottle back on the shelf saying words I couldn’t understand, and then began to jump around,” reported Kaori Wakai, Body Shop employee, “I guess he was in pain. His friend was laughing at him. He said a word I cannot repeat and then ran out of the store.”

  1. This is probably one of the funniest things I have read in this class so far. I really like the way that it is set up like a news artical.

  2. marlen,this was so funny and a clever approach to writing a short narrative. the last sentence is the best, and a good way to end it. like i already said, this reminded me of the jim carey movie “liar liar” when he beats himself up in the bathroom during court.

  3. the essay was very interesting, their wasn’t any off topic or boring moments. I really like the end when you said the bottle was unavailable to comment.

  4. I can totally relate to your story! Within two months when I was younger, I got bug spray, furniture polish, and popcorn in my eye. So I figuratively and literally mean “I feel your pain.”

  5. Marlen,Although this sounds like a horrible experience, the story was still funny. I really liked the quotes from “innocent bystanders” and that the “perpetrator” was not able to comment.

  6. i really like this, the way you described everything in detail made it easy to picture the things you were talking about, nad it was actually kind of funny. Also i feel for you, its happened to me before, getting perfume or cologne in your eye really hurts!

  7. I loved this short story. I could actually picture everything in my head as I read it. Like Marlen :cry crying from the pain of the cologne in his eye. It was so beautifully written and imaginative. I especially liked how it was written like an article and there was witnesses. This was so funny and exciting!Great Marlen!

  8. buuuuuhahahathat was one of the funniest things I have ever part of it allMarlen “I took it like a man”eye wittnesses said “he put his hand over his eye and began to cry” soo good.

  9. You all are asked to put your writing “out there” every week, and so I figured it was only fair to do the same. This is one of my favorite pieces of writing, and it was published on a fragrance website where I once had a regular column. Hell, if I can do it, anyone can!Thanks for the supportive comments!Marlen